Results Or The Lack Of

"Don't attach your happiness to results and don't attach your unhappiness to the lack of results." -Dan Clark

Okay, so I'm not sure how this post is going to go but I really feel that I need to share this. The above quote is something that come to me yesterday as I was talking to my very good friend, Michael. Michael and I have a very cool friendship and he has an amazing soul. He and I share so many of the same beliefs about out journey here on Earth. Thank you, Michael for being that catalyst to my epiphany from the universe.

Most of us know that our happiness doesn't dwell in the acquisition of things. We will never truly be happy by a bigger house, newer car, younger spouse, richer spouse, new job, and so on. These things can give us a false sense of happiness but it quickly fades and we are back where we started. The only way we can truly be happy is to learn to be happy with ourselves. We need to be the reason for our happiness. I think that I have shared this before but, people look at me weird when I tell them that my wife doesn't make me happy. I make me happy. My happiness is all on my shoulders. My responsibility. The people and things in my life can only make me happier. My wife makes me happier. This is something that I really learned and began living a year or so ago and my life really changed.  Don't allow yourself to fall into the trap of "When I get this then I will be happy" or "When this happens I will be happy." It is a very slippery slope that will cause you a lot of misery. We know about "Being the change that we want to see in the world", well, be the happiness that you wish to see in the world. And it starts and ends with you.

I realized, when I was talking with Michael yesterday about the "slump" that I have been in, that I had been attaching my unhappiness to the lack of results without even realizing it. Sure, I would have rather not went through what I went through but I am thankful for the lesson. I was getting depressed because I wasn't seeing certain results show up in my life. I was asking, "Why isn't this happening for me?" and "Where is my opportunity?". This had become very toxic in my life without me even realizing that I was doing it. I had allowed the lack of results to create unhappiness in my spirit. I kept looking outside of me for answers when the real answers are already within me. As toxic as attaching your happiness to things outside of you, attaching my unhappiness to the lack of results was slowing killing me inside. So, like happiness beginning and ending with you, so does your unhappiness.

I can honestly say that the past couple of weeks have been some of the toughest I have faced in some time spiritually. Now that I am aware of what was happening, I can fix it and move on. I am pretty excited to see where this new epiphany will take me. This "slump" is now behind me and it's time to move forward once again. It's time to once again shine. If this or that doesn't happen, it will not change my out look or happiness level. The bar has once again been raised and I am stronger because of this storm. Turning stumbling blocks into stepping stones.

Adapt, Improvise, And Overcome to become your very best.

Lieutenant Dan and the Storm

The link below is to the scene from Forest Gump when Lt. Dan rides out the storm from the mast of the shrimp boat. Not sure why I have been having problem adding a video to my posts. But click on it anyway. :)

http://youtu.be/8ZH9ebAZouk


"Sometimes you just have to wait until the storm passes. Action is not required, only standing strong as the winds howl, the thunder cracks, the lightening strikes, and the down pours of rain. It wasn't a storm of proving what you can accomplish but rather a test of will. Can you be faithful with what you have been given before you are blessed with more? Bring on the rainbow and clearer skies. Life is about feeling blessed through it all."

The above statement is what I post in facebook on September 12th. I wish I could explain what has been going on in my mind. I am feeling fine physically, mentally, and spiritually, but I'm not sure what is going on emotionally. I just can't seem to shake this slump that I have been in. I have taken time for myself, read motivational books, listen to positive music/speeches, and even watched transformational videos, but nothing is working. I am beginning to wonder if I have sent the wrong message to my ego. Now when I say ego, I am talking about the part of us that is of flesh and blood not that part of us that is spirit. Maybe there is some confusion on my ego's part, but I'm not going any where. I was born with the gift to reach people and for me to go back to denying it, is just not going to happen. I have said time and time again that I would speak and coach if I never got paid because it is a part of who I am. I do it because denying it is leading a life less lived. Been there, done that, and I prefer my life with it in my life a lot more than I do without it. That is how I know that it is what I am supposed to do. You call it a hobby, a dream, a "thing" I do, or what ever you want, the point is, it is a part of who I am. You wouldn't just cut off your pinky toes because you think they are useless, they are a part of you. You keep them because they are a part of who you are, they are a part of your identity. 

I know that through this storm in my life, that maybe the most important things that I can do is just stand strong. When we act out of desperation, we are reacting according to out desire to be liked and accepted by others. I want to act because it is the right thing to do. If that means that inactivity is what is right, for the moment, then so be it. I have tied myself to the mast of this ship of speaking and coaching during this storm and I know, beyond a shadow of a doubt, that once this storm is over, I will come out of it still attached to this mast. I may have some battle scars but the scars will be there to remind me that I fought an won. Not out of stubbornness but out of commitment and desire to not quit. I have been a quitter before and I have the bad taste that it leaves. The taste of success is worth whatever I may have to go through. 

I will continue to be faithful with what I have been given up to this point. I will not turn tail and run. I now understand that my legacy is at stake. My identity and reputation will not be tarnish because I chose to give up. 

Adapt, Improvise, And Overcome to become your very best.

 

Breadcrumbs

Wow, it's hard to believe that it has been two weeks since my last blog post. I have had a lot of ups and downs the past couple of weeks. The good news is, my downs aren't near as low as they used to be a couple of years ago. This blog is going to be a continuation of sorts since my last post. I am still in kid of a funk. My mind has been really been playing with my emotions. I feel like a tree just trying to weather the storm. Just in case the doubt that has any questions, I'm not going anywhere. I know that my choice to pursue my passion to speak is what is right for me. This doubt that keeps on crashing in has had me in a place that I really don't like. I know that fighting it, only gives it more attention. I have chosen to acknowledge it's presence and just stand strong like that tree in a storm. This tree will bend, might lose some leaves, maybe even a limb or two, but when this storm passes, I WILL BE STRONGER. I refuse to give in to this doubt. 

So back on September 4, 2013, I posted this on facebook:

Just because you are feeling down, doesn't mean you shut down.When you shut down, you are not receptive to what the universe is telling you. When things are going rough, the universe will drop you a bread crumb to remind you to not to give up and that you are on the right path. Thank you universe for that today.

This post was the day after I had a really tough day internally. The responses that I received, both publicly and in private, from this post confirmed my resolve to stand strong. The universe has tossed me a breadcrumb earlier that day to remind me that my message is needed. A friend of mine told me that she had not forgotten about me and was still planning on having me speak for her organization. I really needed to hear those words that day and the universe knew that I needed it. I am truly grateful for everything in my life, both past and present. My impatience is probably fuel for some of these doubts. Impatience has been something that I have battled with my whole life. 

You might be wondering why, once again, I am sharing what seems like a less than motivational post. One thing that I have tried to pride myself in is that I am an authentic person. I'm not going to hide behind a mask that isn't true to me. I have nothing to gain from being fake, but everything to gain by being authentic with all of you. Even as a person who always seems positive, I have my times of struggle and I'm not afraid to share them with you. If this post does have a message within it, it's this:

Stand strong within the storm. Use this time to come out of the storm better and stronger than before. Be aware when a breadcrumb is thrown your way from the universe. It will let you know when you are on the right path.

Adapt, Improvise, And Overcome to become your very best.