The Repeat Offender

We are all guilty of being repeat offenders. We have wronged the same person more than once. We have lied, broken the speed limit, and maybe even stolen more than once. Now some of these many seem trivial, our biggest crime are those that we commit upon ourselves. We repeatedly make the same mistakes when choosing a mate. We continually neglect our job and wonder why we are unhappy with it. We complain about not having any money and yet we waste what we do have. We keep shooting ourselves in the foot thinking that some how, this time it will be different. We tell ourselves that today we will choose happiness and yet we continually choose actions that take away from our happiness. We are hurting not only ourselves but those closest to us as well. We wonder why we seem to be stuck in a rut, it's because we keep doing the same thing over and over again expecting a different result. And that, my friends, is the definition of insanity. Why do we do thing? We want our lives to be different and yet we keep repeating the things that are holding us back. Change is tough, uncomfortable, and takes persistence. It's easy to do those things that we have always done. We start down the road to change and when time gets tough, we revert to what's comfortable. It's not just our actions that hold us back, but it's also our thought process. If you can change your perspectives and thoughts, you can change your life. You have to be patient with this process. It will take time and a lot of hard work. You didn't get into your current situation over night, you won't get out of it over night. Be patient with yourself, have confidence in yourself and plans, and execute. Stop the cycle of being a repeat offender. You owe it to yourself.

Dream Big...Pursue Big...Live Big.

My Political View...You Have Been Warned

With the elections just a few days away, we are all being inundated with all of these political facebook posts, junk mail ,telemarketers, and commercials. I thought that I would take a moment and express my personal views. In no way shape or form am I supporting any candidate or political party. I might even get "unfriended" because of what I am about to say.

It doesn't matter who you vote for, the system that we are nominating them into is broken. We have become a country that is being run by a government instead of a government being ran by the people. Until we fix the problem, the absolute power that our government has will continue to corrupt the majority that we vote in. There is no longer a system of checks and balances, but a system of payoff and kickbacks. Our government was first established to serve the people not to take advantage of them. Until we, as a nation, rise up and take back that power that we have allowed the government to take from us, we will never be that great nation that we once were. Now don't get me wrong, I love America and I am proud to be an American. But we have become complacent in our ways. Our freedoms are slowly and quietly being taken from us as we turn a blind eye and let it happen. 

I am, by no means, a political or historical scholar. But this is how I see it. How do we fix it? I don't have an exact plan, but something has to be done. I think that we should start with a six year term with no chance of reelection. Once your term is over, you have six months of unemployment to find a new job them you are back to the working class like the rest of us. No more life time benefits. Having to go back into the working class might change your mind about some of the legislation you have to vote on. With a candidate only being in office for six years, I think that it would limit some of the P.A.C. money because they know that that person can only help them for so long. Also, do we really need the electoral college anymore? We have the technology to cast votes for an American Idol, we should be able to come up with a winner with just a popular vote. 

Okay, so I got that off my chest. I'm not telling you who to or not to vote for. I still believe that if you don't vote you have no right to complain about who gets elected. It's time for us to take a stand as a nation of people and stop allowing the politicians to run our lives. We are still the voice and heartbeat of this great nation that we live in. Be heard and let them know that the country's life blood still run through us.

Dream Big...Pursue Big...Live Big

Let Me Tickle Your Ear

You are okay. There is nothing about you that you need to change. It's okay that you spend your money on partying every weekend. It's okay that spending time with your friends instead of your spouse and kids. It's fine that you invest your time with TV instead of investing in yourself. You don't need to read and educate yourself, you already have all the answers. Just keep doing what you have been doing, there is no room for improvement. The people that you have surrounded yourself with will be there for you when you most need them. I think that I have covered most of the bases. I have told you everything that would tickle you ear and keep you where you are in life. After all, it's where you want to be right? Everything is just fine, right? Stop allowing yourself these excuses and stop allowing others to support these excuses. If the people in your life are enabling your poor behavior, find new friends. If you are justifying your actions, STOP. You will never live the life that you desire and deserve until you stop playing these games. Invest discretionary money and time on bettering yourself. Books, seminars, lectures, and so forth. I'm not saying that you can't go out and occasionally have some fun. Gut we have to learn the difference between and investment and an expenditure. Time at the club...an expenditure. Time with your loved ones(not at a bar)....an investment. Investments, most of the time, take time to see the return. As much as we like to think we do, we don't have all the answers. The answers to some of the most important questions that we have in life are outside of ourselves. Others have gone before us and have left hints to where we should be in our life. I may never be a world renowned speaker and coach, but what I will be is true to myself and truthful with you. I will never sugar coat my words and message. I believe that the truth will set you free, but that truth comes at a cost. That cost is your comfort, your vision of you current self, and maybe even your self integrity. Stop allowing yourself and others to keep you from your greatness. Be bold enough to move past where you are in life and start down a path that will lead you to the person that you wholeheartedly want and deserve to be. It's your life, are you going to make excuses or are you going to make changes? Live your greatness.

Dream Big...Pursue Big...Live Big!!!

Leadership...My Way

It has been asked of me, "Why is it you have such a low turn over of employees?" It was also recently said that, "I make managing look easy." I didn't have an answer to the question, nor did I have a response to the statement. I have never thought that I was great at what I do, however, if I based my results solely on numbers, like most corporate people do, I have been pretty successful. They say that numbers don't lie. I have just done my thing and let numbers fall where they may. I know that the numbers that I have produced is what those on the corporate ladder ahead of me see, but I don't manage number. I see myself as a leader of people not numbers. I think that sometimes people complicate leadership. I have been in a leadership position, by title, all but six years of my twenty-one years in retail. My vision of a leader has been to be the kind of employee that I would want to work for me. When I am that person, I am giving the employees the example that I want them to follow. Corporations want employees to buy into their vision statement. I don't think that the average employee cares about it. They care about what is happening within their particular four walls. How is what they are doing going to change their current situation? Most feel like they are not connected to much beyond their direct leader. People want to feel like they are apart of something bigger than their particular job, so, how can they contribute? It is the responsibility of the leader to make that happen. I would rather hire someone with desire than all the knowledge. If they have a desire to make an impact, they can be taught. It is much harder to re-educate and damn near impossible to create a desire that they don't have. Leaders are to be the example. I believe that people will buy into people before they will buy into a vision statement. I have seen vision statement come and go, but people have they ability to make a lasting impression in a way that words never will. Leadership is about confidence and creating the confidence that others need to have in you. People follow people that are leaders. If you are merely spewing guidelines and corporate rhetoric you are not a leader. Your are a corporate puppet. A leader understands people, believes in others, and makes others a part of the process. I have had the opportunity to help develop others beyond where they were and beyond where they thought they could be. People are drawn towards words but commit to people. Every time that I have left a store or company, multiple people have said that they wished I would stay or they cold come with me. It's not because of what I have said, it's because what I have done and how I made them feel. Be the leader that you would follow.

Dream Big...Pursue Big...Live Big

Stop Using Band-Aids

I am as guilty as the next person in this epidemic. So, the finger that I am pointing is as much pointed at me me as it is the next person. But if you feel that I am pointing it directly at you, maybe it's time for a reality check. It has been said that we are the microwave generation. That we want what we want and we want it now. Maybe I have helped feed this need. I daily write motivational quotes on my facebook page in the hope to inspire others, motivate others, and hopefully be a light in what can be a dark world for some. The problem I have seen is that, it is only a band-aid. All I can do is try to help someone get through their day or maybe just that next hour of their day. However, I cannot fix the deep rooted problems that people are dealing with. That is entirely up to them. Stop allowing yourself the crutch of, "I'm just going to get through today." We all have the ability to do more, be more, and live a more abundant life. We don't have to settle for the life that is being handed to us. We have the choice to make it an incredible journey full of happiness, love, passion, and joy. We have to stop acting as though we are okay because we made it through another day. Stop kidding yourself and deal with the real issues. What is causing you to feel like your life is spinning out of control? What in your life is causing you misery? What are those triggers that make you feel depressed? The band-aid of covering today up with some laughter, love, or motivation, will not fix the problem. Grow up and deal with the root causes of your issues in life. Your friends, family, or coworkers cannot fix it. Only you can do that. Grow up, grow a pair, work on the issues, and stop lying to yourself that you are "Okay." We all have inner "demons" that we struggle with and like it or not, your quality of life depends on your willingness to confront them. Simply acknowledging them, talking about them, or even covering them up will only prolong the agony that you feel inside. 

We live in a time that knowledge is at your fingertips. There is no excuse for not exploring your options for improving your quality of life. Almost two years ago, I had to stop allowing myself to make excuses and delve deep within me and get to the root of my issues. Have I completed the journey. By now means am I where I want to be, but I am a hell of a lot closer than I was. What's your excuse? No time? No money? Don't know where to start? All of those excuses can be all summed up into one word. Laziness. If you are reading this, you obviously have access to a computer and there is so much information available to you. Find you local library and read books. I didn't know where to start either, but I knew that if I just started somewhere, the universe would direct my path. I wasn't wrong. Begin today, trade those handy band-aids for action. What do you have to lose? What you have been doing, obviously hasn't been working. 

Dream Big...Pursue Big...Live Big.

Dollars Don't Create Desire

Some will say,"When I get the money, then I can pursue my dreams." Some will say, "If I lived in ______(fill in the blank), then I would be successful." The reasons for not being successful are endless. We continually justify our lack actions toward our dreams.  I understand and get why we haven't done more to achieve our dreams. The bottom line is, it's fear that stops us cold in our tracks. We fear the lack of money, not living in the right place, or not having the right education. 

Truth be told, people with less money, in worse living conditions, and with less education have pursued and accomplished their goals and dreams. Whatever excuse you can come up with, someone has already crushed that excused with persistence and determination. Persistence and determination will conquer all your fears. It's not about becoming an overnight success, it's about taking those small consistent daily steps. 

Every time that I have stagnated in the pursuit of my dreams and passion, has been when I stopped doing those little daily things that I know I should be doing. I stopped my daily reading, my daily affirmations, and daily believing in myself, which lead to me questioning if I should just give up. I don't like the feeling of possibly giving up. I refuse to give up and it's time to fight back. Watch out, here I come dreams and passions.

Dollar don't create desire, but desire can create dollars. Don't get it twisted.

Dream Big...Pursue Big...Live Big

1 Corinthians 13...It's Not Just For Weddings

Most of us have probably been to a wedding where 1 Corinthians 13:4-8(NIV) has been presented in some shape or form. Here it is, to help refresh your memory:
Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails.
This scripture is usually used to help describe the kind of love that should be shared between a couple during marriage. I will take it one step further and say that it should be used in all of our relationships. Now, I, by no means am a bible scholar, but I think that it gives us a great foundation for the kind of love that we should have in our lives for others.

I would like to take a different look at this scripture and apply it to another love that is many times overlooked or even missing in our lives. That love would be, the love that we should have for ourselves.
Love is patient.
     Are you patient with yourself?
Love is kind.
     Are you kind to yourself?
Love does not envy.
     Do you envy your past?
Love does not boast.
     Do you brag yourself up to make yourself feel better about your shortcoming?
Love is not proud.
     Are you a humble person?
Love does not dishonor others?
    Do you talk down to yourself?
Love is not self-seeking.
     Are you putting others' needs before you own?
Love is not easily angered.
     Do you get angry with yourself?
Love keeps no record of wrongs.
     Have you forgiven you?
Love does not delight in evil.
     Do you find joy in getting revenge when other have done you wrong?
Love rejoices with the truth.
     Are you being truthful with you?
Love always protects, trusts, hopes, and perseveres.
     Do you protect and trust you? Do you have hope? Do you persevere or give up when things get tough?

We have to learn how to love ourselves before we can ever really truly be loved by others. Sure others will love us, but loving ourselves opens us up to a more abundant life of love. When we limit our self love, we limit how much love we feel and think that we are worthy of receiving. Loving yourself is not a selfish act, but an act of sacrifice. When you love yourself, not only do you become a stronger person, you become a better parent, spouse, employee, leader, etc. When we work on ourselves we become a more complete person, the person that we were designed to be, and that is the meaning of life.

Learning to love myself was not always easy. It took time. I had to invest in me. This has been the absolute best investment that I have ever made, and it's dividends have paid off immensely. Not only has it improved my financial situation, but more importantly,the relationships in my life.

Dream Big...Pursue Big...Live Big!